Then he said the sweetest thing (or he actually texted me the sweetest thing, since on some days we text more than we talk. This is what the world is coming to.). He said, "I know you don't like the wall color, so lets try to find color that suits you."
Just what I wanted to hear!
Ever since that (text) conversation, (just as an aside, can you call texting back and forth a conversation??) I have spent precious time that I
And this is what I have determined:
- every paint color is wrong, wrong, wrong and I need to paint every room
- all furniture must be sold and new bought
- new light fixtures are a must
- basically the whole house needs a make-over
Can we all say DISCONTENT?
It's true. I was comparing what I have to what others have, and second by second my heart was becoming more and more discontent. It's not a good feeling, either. I feel very flustered and frustrated because it seems like nothing works, and I keep saying to myself If only _______...
Now for the hard part.
Turning back (it seems like I do a lot of this "turning back" business, when I wish that I could for once just stay focused on Him so that I wouldn't have to keep turning back).
I have taken my focus off of The Light. It's time to reach out for my lifeline so He can reign this girl back in. Again.
I haven't been spending much time with God lately, doing more of what I'll call a "quick quiet time" thing (it doesn't work. I do not recommend this method.), and all this focus on what color my rooms should be has taken my thoughts away from Him. And with every minute that goes by that I'm focused on anything other than Him, the more discontent I become.
I wish I could say that it really doesn't matter to me what color my kitchen is, but it does, and I think that is okay--as long as I'm not using my house to fill that void that only God can fill. Thankfully, He's willing to heap His grace and mercy on me no matter how many times I have to turn back, because "out of his fullness we have all received grace..." (John 1:16).
Turning back to truth so I can be loved and accepted, no matter what, and the void that is crying out to filled actually filled to overflowing? Yes, you probably knew this was coming: now THAT'S a great idea!!