I'm still alive!
Last week was a super-busy week for me. All I can say is this: props to all the working mommies out there!! I don't know how you do it and stay sane.
Last Friday, a friend of mine asked me--sweetly--if I had gained some weight.
I have to admit this: I wasn't okay with her question at first, even though I know she wasn't being mean. My mind was flooded with all sorts of questions: Do I look big? Is it that obvious I have gained a few pounds? And I'm wearing black, too!! Black supposed to make you look skinny! Where does she see this weight gain? Does my caboose look as big as I think it does?
At that very moment, my friend had just confirmed everything I was afraid of: I look bigger (i.e. worse) than I used to.
It didn't matter that everything else she said affirmed that she thought I looked good--better, even--than I used to. She said I have curves now that I didn't used to have. That's a good thing...right?
As I thought over our conversation a little more, I started to wonder how society has influenced the way I think when it comes to the fat vs. skinny debate. It seems like society at large believes that thin equals beautiful, and there is a dangerous trend toward being too thin. We are plagued by illnesses like anorexia and bulimia, and according to abcnews.com, weight-loss is a $20 billion-a-year industry (with 85% of those consumers being female-check out some of the statistics here). And I've fallen into the same trap over and over again as I assess every detail of my own weight-loss attempts.
I've allowed myself to believe that thin equals pretty, so naturally, any comment about weight gain would catch me off-guard, while comments pertaining to weight loss would be accepted graciously and with a smile. Even if the latter comments were not compliments. You see? We've been trained to believe that any comments about weight loss are good, but weight gain? Bad. Even if it's a healthy weight gain (I'm not speaking to unhealthy weight gain here, only to a healthy gain-combined with healthy diet and exercise-to a weight within a suggested weight/height range--check out http://www.weightwatchers.com for a suggested range) . Even when the weight gain makes you look better. Even when the weight gain brings out soft curves and a sexy rear.
I'm bringing sexy back... ;)