Friday, August 30, 2013

How. Embarrassing.

It was quiet in the store. A few shoppers going through the sale rack, and some employees ringing customers up. Leave it to me to break the silence as I whacked my head on the elbow of a mannequin as I passed by. (In my defense, her elbow should not have been sticking out so far. Or at the level of my head.). Had I not been looking down at my stash, maybe, just maybe, I would have seen her. Oh for goodness sake...REALLY, Heather?? Really? I promptly looked around to see if anyone had witnessed this ungainly display of human awkwardness.


Maybe normal people would have laughed it off and perhaps even made sure the mannequin didn't fall over. But not I. I walked away. Quickly. Leaving the mannequin teetering dangerously on her pedestal. I'm sure as I'm alive that my face was red as a beet.

Only one though was going through my mind. 

I. Am. Such. A. NERD.

Who, exactly, is apparently so unaware of their own personal space that they whack their own head on the elbow of a mannequin in the middle of an otherwise peaceful store? Who?

I don't deal well with embarrassment. I think I'd rather a hole swallow me up than have other people laugh at me (or "with me", which is such a joke, especially when I'M NOT LAUGHING.). I mean, I can tell a silly story and be okay with it, but in the moment...


I was flipping channels last night and landed on Big Brother (which I didn't even think people watched anymore), and there was this girl being interviewed (Erin, maybe? I guess she had just gotten kicked out of the house. And just as an aside, I thought, who has the time to go live in a house for how ever many days they live there and do absolutely nothing all day long?). So anyway, Julie Chen was calling her out on national television about some comments she had made on the show that were taken as being racist--on national television. This poor girl was stuttering and spluttering and backpedaling so fast I thought she might fall off her stool and melt into a puddle on the floor--which is what I'm sure she felt like doing. I would. But luckily, with a firm handshake from Julie, she was dismissed before it got too bad and she headed off stage. But can you imagine the embarrassment she felt? I mean, I'm all about the old adage THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK, but even so, I've certainly said things that people could have taken the wrong way before, and I've obsessed over it for days. Weeks, even.


I hope she realizes that A) the things she said weren't cool. At all. Even if you are from Texas. B) you should think before you speak. And you should stop trying to be so cool or funny or whatever you were trying to be. C) that everybody makes mistakes, and while hitting one's head on the elbow of a mannequin in the middle of JCP isn't quite as severe as saying something that is construed as narrow-minded and intolerant, we've all been there. And while we can never take back something we've said, we can learn from it and change the way we behave in the future.

Like staying far, far away from mannequins in any and every store...

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