Me. And all of me, at that, was reflected in the wall of mirrors directly across from the treadmill I was running (okay...walk-running...okay, mostly walking) on. Yep. My no-makeup face (some call that a "fresh face, but honestly, there's not a whole lot of "fresh" on my face when I have no makeup on), my sweaty, hastily pulled back hair, my thighs that have a little too much jiggle and my booty that has a little too much shake were all highlighted under the fluorescent lights. Y. A. Y. I eyed the ancient scale in the corner and briefly considered weighing in, only to be reminded that in my more confident and sane moments, I gave up the notion that beauty is a number on the scale. I turned my attention back to the tv (E News, if you must know, and probably not the best choice when trying not to focus on body image, with all their "Who Wore It Best" and such) and my workout and tried to
run walk faster. But honestly, I'm not at the top of my game this week. I haven't slept well and I have no energy. Not a great recipe when trying to run-walk on a treadmill under fluorescent lights with a "fresh face" and sweaty hair. I had to stop. Running, that is.
Then, I did something I am embarrassed to admit.
Desperation mixed with a tired brain and after-thoughts of jiggly thighs took over and I walked...no, I literally ran over to that scale like it was my last supper on earth and I was starving. I weighed. I almost hugged that thing. Good. I could relax. My week of poor workouts and low energy had not affected my weight, thank goodness, because what in the world would I do if it did??
Continue living? I'm gonna bet that I probably would.
And I would also remember this prayer that I found in the book Power of a Praying Wife (I changed a few words for all of us today who are dealing with insecurity or self-confidence issues):
We all, with unveiled faces beholding as in a mirror the glory of The Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Sprit of The Lord. (2 Corinth 3:18)