I'm back from the Frozen North (how people live above the Mason-Dixon line is beyond me) and while it's not anywhere near warm where I live, at least it's not snowing.
Today, my mind feels like play-doh. Was it the long hours riding in the car, the long Thanksgiving dinner, or all the sugar I ate?
There's no way to tell for sure.
But I do know that after I went out today to run a few errands, I am positive of one thing: it's that time of year for everything and everybody to be busy. And people are crazy.
It's probably because I had a really awesome workout this morning combined with my poor planning (I didn't bring a snack to eat for afterwards) that I was a touch grumpy. A curmudgeon, one might say. But I really didn't expect for the parking lot at ACMoore AND TJMaxx to be so crowded, or the lines so long, and I really didn't expect to only find 7 shopping baskets left at Kroger.
It's that time of year again! people say brightly. Time for the hustle and bustle of the holidays! we exclaim. But with every store sending their catalogue to my address, their email to my inbox, their ads for doorbuster savings, Cyber Monday events, and the greatest sales events of the season to my newspaper box, my holiday cheer is all covered up with a big pile of the blahs. I think I may have even told someone today that I hate Christmas (don't judge, I didn't have a snack today--see above).
What's the real reason I'm celebrating this glizty, commercialized holiday, anyway? I always end up feeling sorry for myself because my Christmas decorations don't look like the ridiculous, over-priced ones in the catalogue, I feel rushed by the onslaught of advertisements, flyers, and billboards proclaiming theirs to be the best gift EVER (but you'd better get yours today or this offer will RUN OUT!!!), and the Santa and fake snow displays combined with a 24-hour barrage of It's the MOST WONDERFUL tiiiiiiiiime of the YEAR leave me craving peace and solitude. There is a certain desperation in the way Christmas is presented that makes me want to turn and run in the other direction. I am tired of searching for the perfect gift that will make my children jump for joy. Sick of Christmas music, overly-cheerful deejays and holiday TV specials. Irritated by sales and specials, annoyed by catalogues. Exasperated by blinking lights and cheesy decorations. And the colors of red and green? They are wasted on me.
|I mean really? It's just too much.|
And it's only December 2.
Call me a Scrooge. Bah-humbug.
The fact of the matter is, nothing in this world is going to change. Christmas will continue to be tacky and commercialized. Thanksgiving will be passed over, Halloween decorations will come out in the summertime, and I won't be able to find a coat when February rolls around.
My internal compass is spinning out of control. And the needle is desperately searching for Due North.
They don't know where to find peace.
I don't know about you, but that is certainly true for me. I don't know where to find peace sometimes. It's a confusing message. The world promises peace with every purchase you make, with every decoration you put up, with every ornament you hang. Peace. But peace doesn't come from an outside source. I can't buy it. I can't even see it. It doesn't even come from a blithe saying at the end of church. But I know without a doubt that I want it.
I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart.
And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give.
So don’t be troubled or afraid.
My Due North.