Tuesday, July 8, 2014

The Greater Part of Life is Sunshine

Yesterday, I had the attitude of a crotchety old woman, so I didn't write a post because I knew that it would be all complaints and negativity and darkness bleeding from my black heart.

It's true. Ain't nobody got time fo' dat.

Thank you, Sweet Brown, for a wisdom that can be inserted into nearly every situation.

Last night, I got to go out (read: go out equals a cup of tea at Panera Bread) with a friend of mine that I haven't seen in years. I honestly thought that I had done something to offend her, because the handful of times that we have run into each other, interactions were somewhat stiff, maybe even awkward, and I would walk away wondering what had happened. The girl was one of my bridesmaids, for heaven's sake. I've known her since our early gawky teen years, and now we couldn't even have more than a cordial "Hello" conversation at Kroger.

So when I saw her (at Kroger, obvi, you see everybody there) and she mentioned getting together, I thought it would be good to be open about any sort of offense or misunderstanding that had happened between us. Of course, I was a little anxious, because I didn't know what I had done to perhaps put her off, and conversations that detail what I've done wrong are hard for me. (Sad, but true story. Some of you know this about me.)  But it's not worth permanently losing a friend over something that may have happened five, ten or fifteen years ago, and if I had in any way done something to make her sad or angry, then it was time to apologize.

We sat. We talked shop (read: kids and husbands and life) and when we finally came around to the topic that neither of us was super excited to talk about, we realized that after all these years and polite "Hellos" at Kroger, we were dealing with nothing more than two girls whose lives took two different paths for a short while, who didn't take the time or the effort to take care of a friendship. No offense. No misunderstanding.

While my heart felt lighter when I left Panera, I couldn't help but feel guilty for just letting a friendship fizzle out and all but die. I had let my life and my own priorities get in the way, to the detriment of other relationships.

It makes me sad.  I've lost a lot of friends this way.

But friendship is precious, 
not only in the shade, 
but in the sunshine of life, 
and thanks to a benevolent arrangement 
the greater part of life 
is sunshine.
{thomas jefferson}

A new day, a fresh perspective.

Don't let your relationships go.

They are precious.

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